Sunday, June 15, 2014

A brief word of thanks and encouragement to old, new, and future dads

Due to present circumstances, on which I will elaborate in an upcoming post, this post will be a rather short, but I hope sweet, reflection on fatherhood.

As this is the second straight Father's Day I am spending away from my father, my thoughts might be slightly more nostalgic or romanticized than normal, but the praise I give my dad is fully deserved. Being thousands of miles away from my family allows me to step back a little and realize how blessed I am to have such loving parents. The distance certainly doesn't ease the pain of missing them especially in the difficult moments when the easiest way to react is to let your dad wrap you in a big bear hug and reassure you that everything is going to turn out fine, but I can rest in the knowledge that despite the fact that we are separated by an 11-hour plane ride, my dad (don't worry, mom, I know you love me too!) loves me more than I can imagine and desires the very best for my life, which is why he (and my mom) was willing to let me go so far away to pursue my dreams.

I'm trying to imagine my dad not as a dad, but it's impossible. Being a dad is part of his DNA. It's almost as though when he took on the role of father, all his best qualities were able to reveal themselves to the fullest—love, patience, kindness, service, selflessness, wisdom, honesty. Obviously, I know that's not the case; the transition to fatherhood was neither automatic nor easy. My father was not born a father, the responsibility is not a simple undertaking nor was it a position which comes with a handbook and training. Fatherhood is not a job which always produces tangible rewards; years and years of investment of time, money, and effort can go by without any returns or clear recognition. However, I want to encourage the fathers reading this to strive on, to be an example of what true selfless love is, not just to their children and to their wives but also to the other men in their community; to fight against the temptation of taking the easy way out, the path of least resistance; to lead their family mercifully yet justly because while the rewards may not be visible immediately, when the harvest comes, all the toil put in to the raising of their children will be evident for generations to come.

Fatherhood is an enormous responsibility, but, done right, it is a truly beautiful manifestation of unconditional love and leadership.

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